Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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