Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
