the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
she told me i tasted like america
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Randomize
