Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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