I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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