did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
