Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
