I think i peed on brittanys purse
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
