so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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