What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize