every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
