Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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