I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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