I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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