Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Randomize
