and you said cock pushups were impossible
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
