I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
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It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
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