That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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