I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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