But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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