Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
