Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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