so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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