She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
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