I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize