i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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