playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
You can't just leave with hair like that
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
