I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
