Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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