How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
