theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
