Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Randomize