somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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