I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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