Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
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