he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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