Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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