I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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