The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
