Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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