Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
