i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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