he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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