you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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