I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
