Is it normal to miss your booty call?
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
