they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
