in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
