I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Randomize
