On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
