I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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